Chestnuts in stuffing tastes like someone chewed up a tree branch and then French-kissed it into your mouth.

It is terribly rude to tell people that their troubles are boring.

Or why you are wearing a picture of Santa Clause on you shirts, but-” “It’s Herman Melville.

Of course, it is boring to read about boring thing, but it is better to read something that makes you yawn with boredom than something that will make you weep uncontrollably, pound your fists against the floor, and leave tearstains all over your pillowcase, sheets, and boomerang collection.

Life never end when you are in it.

If you don’t care about something, one way to demonstrate your feelings is to say the word and then repeat the word with the letters S-C-H-M replacing the first letters. Somebody who didn’t care about dentists, for instance could say ‘Dentist, schmentists.

Numbersign questionmark you" and "Asterisk exclamation point the world.