Announcing your death should be like announcing that you are a lunar moth: It must be done quietly or it will not be believed.

Miracles can happen, even to those who are small, flammable, and dressed all in black.

Nowhere in the world is safe," Count Olaf said. Not with you around," Violet agreed. I'm no worse than anyone else," Count Olaf said.

the table of elements does not contain one of the most powerful elements that make up our world, and that is the element of surprise.

Lately it has become more and more difficult to attend dinner parties without the evening ending in gunfire or tapioca.

I was not a particularly brave child, I think, because I had a narrative mind, because my mind automatically went to any terrible thing that could happen.

It is very difficult to make one's way in this world without being wicked at one time or another, when the world's way is so wicked to being with.