I was just passing by. Saw the commotion. Figured you were involved.

An integral part of any best friend's job is to immediately clear your computer history if you die.

Can I brush your hair?” she asked as she led the way, her disposition doing a 180 on a dime. Kids. Can’t live with ’em. Can’t eat ’em for lunch.

You do have a tendency to severe spinal cords." "Only for you.

I was never really certain why he scared the bejesus out of me. Nothing scared me growing up. I’ve been playing with dead people since the day I was born, so it’s good thing, yet the Big Bad scared me. Which brings me to the reason I called.” “Which was to give me nightmares for the rest of my life?” “Oh, no, that’s just a plus. Why was I so scared of him?” “Hon, for one thing he was this powerful, massive, black smokelike being.” “So, you’re saying I’m a racist?

When I want your opinion, I'll remove the duct tape.--T-SHIRT

Hello?" I said, because Charley's House of Pasties seemed wrong.