Listen, here's the thing about an English degree - if you sat somebody down and asked them to make a list of the writers they admire over the last hundred years, see how many of them got a degree in English.

IF YOU PRETEND THE CHARACTERS CANT SPEAK, AND WRITE A SILENT MOVIE, YOU WILL BE WRITING GREAT DRAMA.

We all hope. It's what keeps us alive.

I'm not the guy to ask about politics. I'm a gag writer.

When we leave the play saying how spectacular the sets or costumes were, or how interesting the ideas, it means we had a bad time.

"Based on a true story" is a come-on, the aesthetic equivalent of "no loan request refused." For, at best, the creator has fashioned a film based on his understanding of, interpretation of, and reduction of the report of an actual occurrence.

The audience requires not information but drama.