Boys who spent their weekends making banana nut muffins did not, as a rule, excel in the art of hand-to-hand combat.

Lovers of audio books learn to live with compromise.

If I'm stuck, I get up from my chair and I wash windows. Or... clean the bathroom. Or vacuum the attic. There's always something to be done.

If you read someone else's diary, you get what you deserve.

I needed to temper (my dad's) enthusiasm a bit (about attending Princeton), and so I announced that I would be majoring in patricide...My mom was actually jealous.

When you read comic material and people aren't laughing how do you know they're listening.

I don't think my life is more interesting than anybody else's.