I had always had a little problem looking out for myself in love. I was afraid people would leave me. So I sort of clung and did everything possible to keep someone around. I didn't have a hard talk with myself about who I was keeping around. Doesn't take a rocket scientist to figure that out. I clung to people like human life preservers. I thought i'd die if someone left me. Its ironic because now I'm the one who's leaving.
Deb CalettiIt makes you realize how basically everything we do comes down to a) mating or b) competing for resources. Itโs just like Animal Planet, only weโve got Cover Girl and Victoriaโs Secret instead of colored feathers and fancy markings, and the violence occurs at the Nordstromโs Half-Yearly Sale.
Deb CalettiIt's strange, isn't it, how the idea of belonging to someone can sound so great? It can be comforting, the way it makes things decided. We like the thought of being held, until it's too tight. We like that certainty, until it means there's no way out. And we like being his, until we realize we're not ours anymore.
Deb CalettiYou can forget that other people carry pieces of your own story around in their heads. I've always thought--put together all those random pieces form everyone who's ever known you from your parents to the guy who once sat next to you on a bus, and you'd probably see a fuller version of your life than you even did while living it.
Deb CalettiBut an apology too โ you think youโre giving something, but youโre not. Youโre really asking for something. Youโre asking for forgiveness, youโre asking for the other injured person to make it okay for you. Apologies were harder work for the person getting one than the person giving one.
Deb Caletti