I'm glad that as a 33-year-old working mother, I can still choose to wear a Hello Kitty T-shirt or stay up late scrolling through the Twitter feed of my junior-high crush.

I have a huge repertoire. I love karaoke.

Ah, reality TV: where opportunists delight in exposing opportunism! It's kind of like the indie music scene.

I always wanted to strip. I'm sort of one of those people who would walk past a strip club and while everybody else might give it a passing glance or cracks a joke, I'd be like pressing my face up against the window trying to see in. I was very curious always.

People have always wanted to be recognized, and that's human nature. But people used to want to be recognized for their accomplishments, and now they simply want to be visible.

The fashion industry isn't merely content to encase my meaty flanks in skintight denim. Oh, no! That denim also has to be white, a color that attracts ketchup, wine, garlic aioli, and any other foodstuffs I might otherwise be able to enjoy if I wasn't wearing ridiculously tight pants.

That's also why comedy and horror are my two favorite genres of film to write, because you get these outbursts of emotion from people, laughter and shock, and it's really thrilling, and I like to be thrilled.