Bob Hope, like Mark Twain, had a sense of humor that was uniquely American, and like Twain, we'll likely not see another like him.

The most important thing for old guys is never start going down the stairs sideways.

Haters are going to hate.

I've been talking about retiring for years. It's my standard answer to the question, 'What are your future plans?' The truth is, I'll always want to do things that are worthwhile or fun.

Once I got a job singing and dancing, a reasonable person might think, "Maybe I should learn how to do this." But no, I never did.

Carl Reiner particularly as a writer, a terrific writer. He's just turning out things.

Everybody knows that I'm shorter, but it doesn't bother me at all.