The hardest exercise for most of us fat people is that one where we push our chairback from the dinner table.

I like to buy clothes that are two sizes too small and then take them in a little.

I look like a woman, but I think like a man.

You can bet there's something fishy going on. I guess some large mouth bass left that lipstick on our shirt.

Nobody can ever make enough money for as many poor relatives as I've got. Somebody's got a sick kid, or somebody needs an operation, somebody ain't got this, somebody ain't got that. Or to give the kids all a car when they graduate.

If I could get their attention long enough, I felt they would see beneath the boobs and find the heart, and that they would see beneath the wig and find the brains. I think one big part of whatever appeal I possess is the fact that I look totally one way and that I am totally another. I look artificial, but I'm not.

My weaknesses have always been food and men - in that order.