Avoid any diet that discourages the use of hot fudge.

Grizzly bears eat people without the benefit of music.

In those long, lonely miles you put in during the off-season, and in those knife-in-the-gut repetitions and hill repeats that buckly your knees - at that moment in almost every race when you ask yourself how much you're willing to hurt to catch one more runner - you can draw strength and inspiration from your running mates.

Runners like to train 100 miles per week because it's a round number. But I think 88 is a lot rounder.

You entered a marathon with hills? You idiot.

Eventually, competition and adventure wane, and I enter my ibuprofen phase. Tweaky hamstrings and achy knees restrict mileage, but I continue running for health, sanity, and the ritual of a Sunday trail run with like-minded buddies. We discuss the nagging injuries that bedevil us, and remember the good old days when we were kings.

We (ultra runners) alternate between depression and stupidity.