If anybody ever marries you, it will be for the pleasure of hearing you talk piffle

There is something about wills which brings out the worst side of human nature. People who under ordinary circumstances are perfectly upright and amiable, go as curly as corkscrews and foam at the mouth, whenever they hear the words 'I devise and bequeath.

There were crimson roses on the bench; they looked like splashes of blood.

Learning and literature have a way of outlasting the civilization that made them.

Britain possesses no climate, only weather.

Advertising never sold a bad product twice.

Do you solemnly swear never to conceal a vital clue from the reader? Do you promise to observe seemly moderation in the use of gangs, conspiracies, Super Criminals and Lunatics and utterly and forever to forswear Mysterious Poisons unknown to science? Will you honor the King's English? ... If you fail to keep your promise, may other writers steal your plots and your pages swarm with misprints.