Big deal... the only cats that don't have three legs are the ones with two through zero legs.

The whole pot-to-alcohol thing is a huge issue with me, because I've grown to hate drunks so much, and like potheads.

I know there's a lot of nasty humor directed at celebrities, but my feeling is, in most cases, they deserve it.

I used to make love to Green Day's music. But 9 minutes? I'm not Superman.

I made some jokes about weed, got some laughs, made some more jokes, got some more laughs; next thing you know, I'm telling a lot of jokes about it.

Everyone wants to look good in photographs, even us trolls who tell jokes.

Any comedic entertainment is better when you get high.