If you stick a Babel fish in your ear you can instantly understand anything said to you in any form of language.

If life is going to exist in a Universe of this size, then the one thing it cannot afford to have is a sense of proportion.

The World Wide Web is the only thing I know of whose shortened form takes three times longer to say than what it's short for.

I can see we're in for a fabulous evening's apocalypse.

In many of the more relaxed civilizations on the Outer Eastern Rim of the Galaxy, the Hitch-Hiker's Guide has already supplanted the great Encyclopaedia Galactica as the standard repository of all knowledge and wisdom, for though it has many omissions and contains much that is apocryphal, or at least wildly inaccurate, it scores over the older, more pedestrian work in two important respects. First, it is slightly cheaper; and secondly it has the words DON'T PANIC inscribed in large friendly letters on its cover.

Please relax," said the voice pleasantly, like a stewardess in an airliner with only one wing and two engines one of which is on fire, "you are perfectly safe.

I tend to get very suspicious of anything that thinks it's art while it's being created.