It's just amazing how hard it is for people to change, even when amazing things happen. It almost reinforces who you are instead of making you change.

Our achievements may make us interesting, Tyler, but our darkness makes us lovable.

The Sugar Frosted Nutsack is fantastic. It's volcanic and sexy and utterly unlike anything I've read before. It feels like the future in a dazzling way that has nothing to do with looking backward. It's been a long wait for a new novel from Mark Leyner, but worth it. Ten out of ten from me.

Kids today do nothing. They're so apathetic. We used to go out and protest. All they do is shop and complain.

If you're not a tree hugger, then you're a what, a tree hater?

Christmas makes everything twice as sad.

One of the cruelest things you can do to another person is pretend you care about them more than you really do.