Friends are family you choose.

You ought to try surviving one of my family reunions. It's like having a bowling alley in your brain.

Love is so fragile and so often fatal. I am amazed when people are brave enough to risk it.

... I have become a conscientious objector in the war between the sexes.

True friends are those who really know you but love you anyway.

Men give love because they want sex. Women give sex because they want love. That's the difference between men and women. Ever notice how when we talk about our love lives, it's always about a man? Singular. All most of us want is one good man. But when men talk, it's about women. Plural. They want as many as they can get.

Books are like your children. They take nine months to write; the manuscript weighs six pounds and...you send them out into the world and hope that some day they'll send back money.