I care passionately about equal rights [and] animal rights.

I cannot imagine not going home to animals. They are the closest thing to God. They don't harbour resentment.

Procrastinate now, don't put it off.

I had no intention of becoming a comedian. I just wanted to make people happy. I tried everything-I shucked oysters, I painted houses, I sold vacuum cleaners. But there was always a voice saying, You should be doing something different. And it was usually my boss and I was being fired.

I think gender plays a part in most things, but I don't know how it would be different because I've never been a man. And my fame is different from Nicole Kidman's or Sharon Stone's. I think everybody's fame is different.

I'm just saying we can all work on our manners. We can say please and thank you. We can be punctual. We can just be nicer to one another. It's something we have in our power to do. It reminds me of that Margaret Mead quote: "Never doubt that a small group of thoughtful, committed citizens can change the world. Indeed, it's the only thing that ever has.

Normally, I try not to pay attention to my haters, but this time I'd like to talk about it, because my haters are my motivators.