When I'm tired and therefore indecisive, it can take half an hour to choose the book I am going to have with me while I brush my teeth.

You never came out the way you came in.

The emotions that sustain religious belief are all, in fact, deeply ordinary and deeply recognisable to anybody who has ever made their way across the common ground of human experience as an adult.

If you based your knowledge of the human species exclusively on adverts, you'd think that the normal condition of humanity was to be a good-looking single person between 20 and 35, with excellent muscle-definition and/or an excellent figure, and a large disposable income.

If your memory was OK you could descend upon on a bookshop – a big enough one so that the staff wouldn’t hassle a browser – and steal the contents of books by reading them. I drank down 1984 while loitering in the 'O' section of the giant Heffers store in Cambridge. When I was full I carried the slopping vessel of my attention carefully out of the shop.

Emotions can certainly be misleading: they can fool you into believing stuff that is definitely, demonstrably untrue.

I can always tell when you're reading somewhere in the house,' my mother used to say. 'There's a special silence, a reading silence.