I advise treating the studio audience like a nightclub audience because that's the reason you're doing television - to get them to come see you in a nightclub.

Being a professional comedian is doing it right and good, when you don't feel like it.

Ideally, you want to be in a fifty-fifty power-sharing arrangement with the audience - both of you are there for a mutually enjoyable experience.

Evaluate every performance on: stage presence, concentration, delivery, material and lessons learned.

It's better to play to the host as though in a real conversation and let the audience listen in- which they are.

An aspiring comedian must be determined to get to his or her true feelings on a subject and convey that to the audience. Figure out what you're feeling or interested in because the goal is to get the audience interested in what you're interested in. Good stand up comedy is drawing people into your head.

When I saw a sign on the freeway that said, "Los Angeles 445 miles," I said to myself, "I've got to get out of this lane."