What is really important in Man is the part of him that we do not understand. Of much of it we are not even conscious, just as we are not normally conscious of keeping up our circulation by our heart-pump, though if we neglect it we die.

I learned long ago, never to wrestle with a pig. You get dirty, and besides, the pig likes it.

If women were as fastidious as men, morally or physically, there would be an end of the race.

When you find something funny search it for hidden truth.

A perpetual holiday is a good working definition of hell.

Most of the money given by rich people in "charity" is made up of conscience money, "ransom," political bribery, and bids for titles.... One buys moral credit by signing a cheque, which is easier than turning a prayer wheel.

When an apparent miracle happened.it proved divine mission to the credulous, and proved a contract with the devil to the skeptical.