Music is the brandy of the damned.

You can always tell an old soldier by the inside of his holsters and cartridge boxes. The young ones carry pistols and cartridges; the old ones, grub.

I am enclosing two tickets to the first night of my new play; bring a friend... if you have one.

Thus, I blush to add, you can not be a philosopher and a good man, though you may be a philosopher and a great one.

He never does a proper thing without giving an improper reason for it.

Once there was a time when all people believed in God and the church ruled. This time is called the Dark Ages. He who can, does. He who cannot teaches.

We throw the whole drudgery of creation on one sex, and then imply that no female of any delicacy would initiate any effort in that direction.