A drama critic is a man who leaves no turn unstoned.

I wish people would stop talking about my birthday.

I lay my eternal curse on whomsoever shall now or at any time hereafter make schoolbooks of my works and make me hated as Shakespeare is hated. My plays were not designed as instruments of torture. All the schools that lust after them get this answer, and will never get any other.

There are no secrets better kept than the secrets everybody guesses.

A critic is one who leaves no turn unstoned.

People who are hard, grasping and always ready to take advantage of their neighbors become very rich.

Now of all the idealist abominations that make society pestiferous I doubt if there be any so mean as that of forcing self-sacrifice on a woman under the pretense that she likes it.