People who say it cannot be done should not interrupt those who are doing it.

Very nice sort of place, Oxford, I should think, for people that like that sort of place. They teach you to be a gentleman there. In the polytechnic they teach you to be an engineer or such like. See?

There is nothing on earth intended for innocent people so horrible as a school.

There are no secrets better kept than the secrets everybody guesses.

My mother married a very good man ... and she is not at all keen on my doing the same.

When asked which dog wins, he reflected for a moment and replied, "The one I feed the most."

Which painting in the National Gallery would I save if there was a fire? The one nearest the door of course.