The best way to get your point across is to entertain.

I can forgive Alfred Nobel for having invented dynamite, but only a fiend in human form could have invented the Nobel Prize.

I can't talk religion to a man with bodily hunger in his eyes.

In literature the ambition of the novice is to acquire the literary language; the struggle of the adept is to get rid of it.

If only for a half hour a day, a child should do something serviceable to the community

War can so easily be gilt with romance and heroism and solemn national duty and patriotism and the like by persons whose superficial literary and oratorical talent covers an abyss of Godforsaken folly.

Though I can make my extravaganzas appear credible, I cannot make the truth appear so.