My way of joking is to tell the truth

Without art, the crudeness of reality would make the world unbearable.

A man of great common sense and good taste - meaning thereby a man without originality or moral courage.

Better never than late.

How can you dare teach a man to read until you've taught him everything else first?

Poverty does not produce unhappiness: It produces degradation.

Girls, like men, want to be petted, pitied, and made much of, when they are diffident, in low spirits, or in unrequited love. These are services which the weak cannot render to the strong and which the strong will not render to the weak, except when there is also a difference of sex.