The chief objection to playing wind instruments is that it prolongs the life of the player.

Except during the nine months before he draws his first breath, no man manages his affairs as well as a tree does.

When people shake their heads because we are living in a restless age, ask them how they would like to life in a stationary one, and do without change

It is not that I am so clever; it is that everyone else is so stupid.

Success covers a multitude of blunders.

When you want to put something into your part that is not in the play, you must ask the author-or some other author-to lead up to the interpolation for you. Never forget that the effect of a line may depend not on its delivery, but on something said earlier in the play, either by somebody else or by yourself, and that if you change it, it may be necessary to change the whole first act as well.

Set me anything to do as a task, and it is inconceivable the desire I have to do something else.