Let a man walk ten miles steadily on a hot summer's day along a dusty English road, and he will soon discover why beer was invented.

A man who says that no patriot should attack the Boer War until it is over is not worth answering intelligently; he is saying that no good son should warn his mother off a cliff until she has fallen over it.

The criminal is the creative artist; the detective only the critic.

Children are grateful when Santa Claus puts in their stockings gifts of toys or sweets. Could I not be grateful to Santa Claus when he put in my stockings the gift of two miraculous legs? We thank people for birthday presents of cigars and slippers. Can I thank no one for the birthday present of birth?

Atheism is indeed the most daring of all dogmas . . . for it is the assertion of a universal negative.

Marxism: The theory that all the important things in history are rooted in an economic motive, that history is a science, a science of the search for food.

You may think a crime horrible because you could never commit it. I think it is horrible because I could commit it.