Having no talent is no longer enough.

Democracy is supposed to give you the feeling of choice, like Painkiller X and Painkiller Y. But they're both just aspirin.

I think the Chinese will say the hell with you and pull their money out of the United States. That's the end of our wars.

I never miss a chance to have sex or appear on television.

I Must warn you, Iris, that I'm not a believer. And though I'm sure that the revelations of other men must be a source of infinite satisfaction to them, individually, I shouldn't for one second be so presumptuous as to make a choice among the many thousands of recorded revelations of truth, accepting one at the expense of all the others: I might so easily choose wrong and get into eternal trouble. And you must admit that the selection is wide, and dangerous to the amateur.

Having no talent is no longer enough.

The fool is often oblivious of his own gaucherie.