There comes a time in every man's life when he's consumed by the desire to spit on his palms, hoist the black flag and start cutting throats.

A man is called a good fellow for doing things which, if done by a woman, would land her in a lunatic asylum.

Freedom of press is limited to those who own one.

During many a single week, I daresay, more money is spent in New York upon useless and evil things than would suffice to run the kingdom of Denmark for a year.

Always remember this: If you don't attend the funerals of your friends, they will certainly not attend yours.

Syllogisms а la mode - If you are against labor racketeers, then you are against the working man. If you are against demagogues, then you are against democracy. If you are against Christianity, then you are against God. If you are against trying a can of Old Dr. Quack's Cancer Salve, then you are in favor of letting Uncle Julius die.

The only way to success in American public life lies in flattering and kowtowing to the mob