The only good bureaucrat is one with a pistol at his head. Put it in his hand and it's good-bye to the Bill of Rights.

Genius: the ability to prolong one's childhood.

To wage a war for a purely moral reason is as absurd as to ravish a woman for a purely moral reason

After all, why be good? How many will actually believe it of us?

Progress: The process whereby the human race has got rid of whiskers, the vermiform appendix and God.

The common man knows exactly what he wants...and deserves to get it good and hard.

the average man does not want to be free. he simply wants to be safe.