Some time ago a publisher told me that there are four kinds of books that seldom, if ever, lose money in the United States--first,murder stories; secondly, novels in which the heroine is forcibly overcome by the hero; thirdly, volumes on spiritualism, occultism and other such claptrap, and fourthly, books on Lincoln.

Nature abhors a moron.

It is my conviction that no normal man ever fell in love, within the ordinary meaning of the term, after the age of thirty.

The Gettysburg Adress has been included, of late, in several anthologies of poetry. It actually meets the major requirement of all poetry: It is a mellifluous and emotional statement of the obviously not true. The men who fought for self-determination at Gettysburg were not the Federals but the Confederates.

It is only doubt that creates. It is only the minority that counts.

Popularity--The capacity for listening sympathetically when men boast of their wives and women complain of their husbands.

In human history a moral victory is always a disaster, for it debauches and degrades both the victor and the vanquished.