If I had my way, any man guilty of golf would be ineligible for any office of trust in the United States.

High-toned humanitarians constantly overestimate the sufferings of those they sympathize with.

The Christian always swears a bloody oath that he will never do it again. The civilized man simply resolves to be a bit more careful next time.

The truly civilized man is always skeptical and tolerant, in this field as in all others. His culture is based on 'I am not too sure'.

The demagogue is one who preaches doctrines he knows to be untrue to men he knows to be idiots.

When somebody says it’s not about the money, it’s about the money.

Women hate revolutions and revolutionists. They like men who are docile, and well-regarded at the bank, and never late at meals.