My belief in free speech is so profound that I am seldom tempted to deny it to the other fellow. Nor do I make any effort to differentiate between the other fellow right and that other fellow wrong, for I am convinced that free speech is worth nothing unless it includes a full franchise to be foolish and even...malicious.

There is no record in human history of a happy philosopher: they exist only in romantic legend.

The intellectual heritage of the race belongs to the minority.

The way to hold a husband is to keep him a little jealous; the way to lose him is to keep him a little more jealous.

How little it takes to make life unbearable: a pebble in the shoe, a cockroach in the spaghetti, a woman's laugh.

Puccini - silver macaroni, exquisitely tangled.

There are two impossibilities in life: "just one drink" and "an honest politician."