The Irish do not want anyone to wish them well; they want everyone to wish their enemies ill.

We are all inclined to judge ourselves by our ideals; others, by their acts.

The gift of broadcasting is, without question, the lowest human capacity to which any man could attain.

Only one person in 1000 is a bore, and HE is interesting because he is one person in 1000.

The great secret of a successful marriage is to treat all disasters as incidents and none of the incidents as disasters.

The Irish do not want anyone to wish them well; they want everyone to wish their enemies ill.

Every schoolmaster after the age of forty-nine, is inclined to flatulence is apt to swallow frequently and to puff