I have never believed much in luck, and my sense of humor has tended to walk on the dark side.

If you're going to be crazy, you have to get paid for it or else you're going to be locked up.

["Where the Buffalo Roam" is] horrible pile of crap. [Bill] Murray did a good job. But it was a bad script. You can't beat a bad script. It was just a horrible movie. A cartoon. But Bill Murray did a good job. We actually wrote and shot several different endings and beginnings and they all got cut out in the end. It was disappointing.

I'm doing an introduction for one of Ralph's [Steadman] books. He's doing something called Gonzo, the Art I think he's stealing from me. I like Steadman and his coattail abilities. Ralph is better at business than I am. He has always managed to get free whiskey.

I am a road man for the lords of karma.

I believe the Republicans have never thought that democracy was anything but a tribal myth.

Weird behavior is natural in smart children, just as curiosity is to a kitten.