My ego doesn't need soothing. I don't want him soothing anything of mine, including you.

Nice plan. Take the gullible outsiders, walk them around for a bit, then feed them to the giant tortoise.

If a cultural reference flies over a man's head, does it make a sound if nobody else gets it.

I wouldn't be able to do anything with my vampire horde except make it run around in a herd, but it would be a very impressive herd.

I don't know if you heard, but I kind of run this place.

Secret to what?" "Secret to shutting you up," he said. "I just have to beat you till you're half-dead, then give you chicken soup and"--he raised his hands--"blessed silence.

Just reflecting on the fact that when the Universe punches you in the teeth, it never just lets you fall down. It kicks you in the ribs a couple of times and dumps mud on your head.