The newspaper is a lecture. The Web is a conversation.

I'll start drinking tea over coffee when the big hand is on Never and the little hand is on Ain't Gonna Happen.

I don't believe in the very concept of "first thing in the morning." I'm a "third thing in the afternoon" fellow.

Genius flames and dies, but amiable competence can live forever.

I regret that after 30 years of writing columns in this market, including ten with this newspaper that I love very much, this local conversation has come to an end. However, I believe that if the newspapers of the country pool their resources, we can send an Arnold-Schwartzenegger-style robot back in time to kill the inventor of the Internet, and then our future will be much brighter.

Ah, if only the best place for storing embryonic stem cells was Yucca Flat.

When your opponent sets up a straw man, set it on fire and kick the cinders around the stage. Don't worry about losing the Strawperson- American community vote.