I heard this expression once: Each time someone dies, a library burns. I'm watching it burn right to the ground.

My sister will die over and over again for the rest of my life. Grief is forever. It doesn't go away; it becomes a part of you, step for step, breath for breath. I will never stop grieving Bailey because I will never stop loving her. That's just how it is. Grief and love are conjoined, you don't get one without the other. All I can do is love her, and love the world, emulate her by living with daring and spirit and joy.

In one split second I saw everything I could be, everything I want to be. And all that I'm not.

But what if music is what escapes when a heart breaks?

I'm layering away: sauce, noodles, I belong to you, cheese, sauce, my heart is yours, noodles, cheese, I hear your soul in your music, cheese, cheese, CHEESE.

Let me just unsubscribe to my own mind already, because I don't get any of it.

What kind of world is this? And what do you do about it? What do you do when the worst thing that can happen actually happens?