Not that I was ever an asshole but I used to be much more of a bulldozer.

Evil is in the face of every frat guy that ever raised a beer cup and went "whoooooo!"

The directing thing, to do it well, I think you have to have a hell of a lot more discipline than I do, or be a lot more willing to really take charge of whole large group of people than I feel comfortable doing - because a director really has to run everything, and be very confident in their ability to do so.

Iraq is a manufactured conflict for the sake of geopolitical dominance in the area.

For my stand-up, I always have my notebook with me and if something strikes me, I'll write it down.

I would never join the Tea Partiers, because I don't have a problem with the color of Obama's skin. I don't have a problem with immigrants. You know what I mean? I do have genuine problems with policy and government corruption. Sure I do. And I speak very candidly about that, regardless of who's in office. But since the Tea Partiers are ridiculous, why would I urge anyone to participate with them?

I can't wait for the next fad though, and I predict it's going to be Pennsylvania dutch culture, very Amish. It's going to be bonnets and butter churns.