I'm done with men. I have a hamster. That's all I need.

It's the twenty-first century." I told Tank. "Women drive." "Only in my bed," Tank said. "Never in my car.

I took all of my rejection letters - there must have been thousands of them in a huge box - and I went out on the curb and burned them all, crying.

I want to be there when you get Cubbin. And I don’t want to be left out of the television show either. Little people are sexy now. Have you seen Game of Thrones? We’re hot.

And then it gets so hot that they keep the supermarkets too cold. Hot, cold. Hot, cold. It gives me the runs." Mr. Landowsky

Howie's doctor told him to lose ten pounds, and since Howie's been on a diet he's gained three.

I'd kiss you, but you smell like a gym bag.