You know what you call the two winners of that $580 million PowerBall lottery? ... Former Democrats

I don't know why it's so hard to believe women. You to go Saudi Arabia and you need two women to testify against a man. Here you need 25.

Well, it looks like we've moved a step closer to war. Not with Iraq. With France and Germany. How did we screw that one up?

Don't forget Mother's Day. Or as they call it in Beverly Hills, Dad's Third Wife Day.

Al Jazeera aired a new tape of Osama bin Laden. It was the usual stuff, he called Bush evil, the Great Satan, called him a war monger. Basically, the same thing you heard at last night's Democratic debate.

Anybody can have a life. Careers are hard to come by.

According to CNN, Donald Rumsfeld said the war in Iraq did not go according to plan. And President Bush said, 'What? We had a plan?'