…a cheerful black shadow reared up behind him as he spoke, thundering a happy challenge to my Dark Passenger, which slid forward and bellowed back.

I don't do my job to catch the bad guys. Why would I want to do that? No, I do my job to make order out of chaos.

They like to tell us that it is important to speak the truth, but it has been my experience that real happiness lies in having people tell you what you want to believe, usually not the same thing at all, and if you have to stub your toe on the truth later, so be it.

I did not like this feeling of having feelings.

I am unlovable...I have tried to involve myself in other people, in relationships, and even - in my sillier moments - in love. But it doesn't work. Something in me is broken or missing and sooner or later the other person catches me Acting or one of Those Nights comes along.

But what could I do? Be stupid for a while? I wasn't sure I knew how, even after so many years of careful observation.

I nodded with genuine synthetic sympathy.