Opportunities flit by while we sit regretting the chances we have lost, and the happiness that comes to us we heed not, because of the happiness that is gone.

It is well we cannot see into the future. There are few boys of fourteen who would not feel ashamed of themselves at forty.

A Spaniard will seek to persuade you that the bull-ring is an institution got up chiefly for the benefit of the bull.

I did not intend to write a funny book, at first. I did not know I was a humorist. I have never been sure about it. In the middle ages, I should probably have gone about preaching and got myself burnt or hanged.

Give an average baby a fair chance, and if it doesn't do something it oughtn't to a doctor should be called in at once.

Cheese, like oil, makes too much of itself.

Swearing relieves the feelings - that is what swearing does. I explained this to my aunt on one occasion, but it didn't answer with her. She said I had no business to have such feelings.