Poor people are gross and they 'smell bad

If I get no sleep the night before a show, I feel that performance is the best one.

Don't be a hero, live to fight another day.

I can't watch myself in interviews. I feel like I look like a wreck. My mom is always calling me and going, 'Stop fidgeting,' and it's like, 'You have no idea what it's like, Mom.'

The truth is people are very nice. The other truth is, it's very annoying to be constantly interrupted. I don't love myself enough to want to share myself with everybody.

I made the mistake of writing something very, very short about Obama for this website that I write fiction for and my father told me never do that again. And he was right. I have nothing to add to a political conversation because it’s not my area.

And I'm sure after Facebook it will be the little cameras that we have implanted into the palms of our hands and we'll be debating whether we should get them, and then we'll all get them.