Somewhere out there was a village I'd deprived of it's idiot.

As in 'The Three Billy Goats Gruff'?" The skull howled with laughter. "You just got your ass handed to you by a nursery tale?""I wouldn't say they handed me my ass," I said.Bob was nearly strangling on his laughter, and given that he had no lungs it seemed gratuitous somehow. "That's because you can't see yourself," he choked out. "Your nose is all swollen up and you've got two black eyes. You look like a raccoon. Holding a dislocated ass.

Evil isn’t the real threat to the world. Stupid is just as destructive as Evil, maybe more so, and it’s a hell of a lot more common. What we really need is a crusade against Stupid. That might actually make a difference.

I ask people impertinent questions. Hopefully turning up pertinent answers.

What is the point of having free will if one cannot occasionally spit in the eye of destiny?

Don't call me a dinosaur. It isn't fair to the dinosaurs. What did a dinosaur ever do to you?

You don't take your cat with you to go bird shopping. Not because the cat isn't polite, but because he's a cat.