I want to be a positive force in the world, I would like to make people happy.

One thing I hope I'll never be is drunk with my own power. And anybody who says I am will never work in this town again.

My teacher in the seventh grade told me that if I didn't fool around during class, I could have 15 minutes at the end of the day to do a comedy routine. Instead of bugging everybody, I'd figure out my routine. And at the end of the day, I'd get to perform in front of my entire class. I thought it was really smart of her. It's amazing how important that was.

I'm the first to admit this whole salary thing is getting out of control. In the final analysis, it's still about the work.

I enjoy fame except when I'm with my daughter. Kids stop me all the time and I don't want her to be jealous of the attention. Also, sometimes I just want to be left alone and I refuse to make rubber faces. That's when they start asking, What's the matter, man, don't you like your job? I say, Yeah, I like my job. But I also like having sex, and I'm not going to do that in front of you either.

I just love to skate. When I put a skate on the ice, I'm free from the world, and I have no problems at all. I am a bird!

Uh uh uh, turning the car into oncoming traffic... is counterproductive!