As for basic jokes about sex and even my religious stuff, I don't find any problems with that, even if I'm gigging in the Bible Belt, because religious people don't come and see me.

Do you think pandas know they're Chinese and they're taking the one child policy a bit too seriously?

Nobody cares that you're smart and nobody cares that your kids don't have bruises.

Because of the way I've made my money or the way I've conducted myself in public to get success, it doesn't make me any better a person. So I always thought money and achievement would make me a more legitimate person, where my family seems to think it's all about actions.

I have tried reading the Bible but that's a tough read there. I watch a lot of religious documentaries. I have a keen interest in religion for someone who's not religious.

I don't write my standup on paper or anything; but I just organically do it on stage, have an idea, chat it up a little bit. I'm keeping notes. I'm trying to keep up with this world and try to bring out a special every year.

Can't punch women in the face!