That to me is the way any good romantic would look at his life: Live it first, then write it down before you go.
My head hurts, my feet stink, and I don't love Jesus. It's that kind of morning.
The only thing that is still free in this world is religion, which is why a lot of people "find it.
We need more fruitcakes in this world, and less bakers!
If the phone doesn't ring, it's me.
Why don't we get drunk and screw?