John McCain addressed critics who believe he will be too old to run for a sixth term in the Senate, saying that he's still healthy and ready to go. Then people around McCain said, 'Why is he talking to that mannequin?'
Jimmy FallonThank you, horseradish, for being neither a radish nor a horse. What you are is a liar food.
Jimmy FallonWhen you were a kid, it [work in IBM] seemed like an awesome job. I'd get to go to work and have a briefcase. I loved how Dad wore a tie and got a car. I didn't know if all those things came together. I'd see my dad go off to work and we'd wait for him to come home, and we'd all be excited to see him.
Jimmy FallonHillary Clinton used a private email account to conduct official state business. Experts say that if this violates any federal rules, then she . . . will still be president.
Jimmy Fallon