It's Friday. That's one reason to celebrate. Also, it's the first day in a long time when no one declared they're running for president.

Honestly, I just want to keep people awake. Or at least give you one joke to go to bed with.

Look, I know these Rick Perry jokes are a little mean, but tomorrow, he won't even remember them.

A tell-all book by David Axelrod, one of President Obama's former strategists, reveals that Obama chose Joe Biden as his VP because of his energy and enthusiasm. You know, the qualities you look for in someone whose main job is traveling to state funerals.

I just feel like people like a little break. Especially at 12:37 at night, you go, like, 'I'm just tired of the snarky right now. I just want to lie down and have somebody make me laugh for an hour. Entertain me, and then I'm going to sleep with a smile on my face.' That's my job; that's what I do.

I'm so excited. Jay Leno is on the show tonight. He brought some really funny jokes and some great stories. Although I'm a little concerned he also brought his old desk and Kevin Eubanks. I just want Jay to be comfortable, but not too comfortable.

Success is.... happiness. Is that too Deepak Chopra?