In a new interview, Herman Cain said that if Rick Perry were an ice cream flavor, he'd be 'Rocky Road.' I don't know, Perry's not really any flavor of ice cream. He's just the brain freeze part.

John McCain responded to critics who say he's too old for a sixth term by saying that his mother is 103 years old and doing well. The crazy thing is that even she is somehow younger than John McCain.

[Writing a joke] there is no team of writers. It's just you in an office, staring at yourself in the mirror.

I like being absurd. Being silly.

Don't keep reaching for the stars because you'll just look like an idiot stretching that way for no reason.

The U.S. is re-establishing relations with Cuba. But before President Obama can lift the embargo, it will need approval from the Republican-controlled Congress - or as Republicans who called Obama said, 'Close, but no cigar.'

I love Nashville. I've been here so many times... oh man, I would stay here for a year if I could. It's just so much fun.